Vindicated

There are moments in a one's life that go to vindicate the things that you believe and the investments that you've placed within your life. Landing a new position as an Organizer this weekend did that for me.

Have you ever felt like your life's worth wasn't being fulfilled? Or that you were stuck in a rut and you weren't as smart, or as talented, or as lucky as you thought? I felt all of those things in the past few months in one way or another. My dream had been to be in law school by 25 and to be a success lawyer/consultant/politician by then. But life changes and people change. Since January, I hadn't been doing much. I had been laid off and looking for a position. I was embarrassed. I was ashamed. I wasn't who I thought I could be.

The things you once needed no longer fit into your life.

By happenstance, I was given an opportunity to interview with the company that I was hired for. When I was packing to leave Houston at the beginning of the year, I was encouraged by my father and one of my mentors from college to seek this program out, send a resume and ask if there was a possibility that I could be hired. Impressed with my resume and a brief phone conversation, I was invited to dinner by the executive director of the Houston chapter of the organization. At the dinner, the executive director expressed interest in hiring me but the interview process and selection would be brutal.

I was then invited to Louisiana for a weekend training of volunteers and members followed by a seminar in Austin, TX where the interview gauntlet would continue. In Louisiana I did close to eight or nine interviews, where the biggest sticking point against hiring me was that "I was too young to become an organizer" or that "I didn't have enough experience". Each interview was grueling and had a brief focus on my faults and mistakes in life, as well as what I have learned and possess. In Austin, the breakneck speed of interviews and meetings continued. I would do 7 interviews in one day (!!!), including one with a world famous organizer and national director (god was that intense). In each of these interviews, I had to prove myself and actually tell people that although my life isn't where I want it to be I am smart, I am talented, I am confident and I am growing into who I think I could become.

And I was vindicated. I was offered a great position in Baton Rouge and a better salary than what I previously had. The fears and disappointment that had taken a precedent in my life for that past few months had dissipated and I had achieved. Fear and discomfort in trying something new or difficult are ultimately what bind us to defeat and complacency. We have to break those chains of mediocrity and fear if we want to reach our dreams.

I can only hope that this step in the right direction is the beginning of my emancipation from fear.